Turd Quotes

Quote of the Day


I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.
View quotes by Woody Allen

Satire is what closes Saturday night
View quotes by George S Kaufman

A Christian is a man who feels
Repentance on a Sunday
For what he did on Saturday
And is going to do on Monday.
(The Christian, 1909)
View quotes by Thomas Russell Ybarra

He's a gent from Monday to Friday... then on Saturday, out comes the beast. [on Alex Ferguson]
View quotes by Paul Ince

I used to watch Cat Deeley on Saturday mornings and think, 'I really wish I could wear a pretty top like that.' But if I did, Id look like I was trying to pull my pundits.
View quotes by Gabby Logan

Presenting Saturday mornings has been a dream for a long time. And one day in September I am going to wake up very early and it will be a reality. I can't wait.
View quotes by Fearne Cotton

I left my boots in the dressing room after the game on Saturday because I was sure I wasn't going to get called up. They were in a skip being taken to the training ground, but I decided to go back and get them - just in case.
View quotes by Andy Johnson

I'm glad to say that this is the first Saturday in four weeks that sport will be weather-free [classic Colemanball!]
View quotes by David Coleman

The manager pulled me aside on the Saturday morning and said that he will be the one deciding when I'm going to be retiring.
View quotes by Roy Keane

Every man has a right to a Saturday night bath.
View quotes by Lyndon Johnson

Originally we were going to title it 'The Daily Show With Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays Off,' but it was too long.
View quotes by Jon Stewart

Two small, sturdy boys stood alone on the empty deck of the Channel steamer
View quotes by Arthur Hamilton Gibbs

It is 10 past 11 on my watch. It is funny when somebody asks me how long is to go on a Saturday. I just wanted a reminder that when I get ideas above my station, how football can kick you in the guts
View quotes by Gordon Strachan

On Thursday [when the game of croquet took place] the deputy prime minister was not standing in for the prime minister.

He stands in for him only when he goes on holiday. He went on holiday on Saturday.

This was an away-day for the deputy prime minister's staff, who've had a change of responsibilities [on John Prescott's scandalous playing habits... on the croquet lawn]
View quotes by Paul Clark

I do think he's right for the job.

I spent the day [Sunday] in Downing Street at a meeting that John Prescott chaired looking at what we were doing in response to this earthquake in Yogyakarta.

He then came over the road to thank the different emergency teams that have been working since the early hours of Saturday morning. [explaining the point of John Prescott]
View quotes by Hilary Benn

If you really want to advise me, do it on Saturday afternoon between 1 and 4 o'clock. And you've got 25 seconds to do it, between plays. Not on Monday. I know the right thing to do on Monday.
View quotes by Alex Agase

I am enjoying being manager - except for Saturday afternoons
View quotes by Kevin Bond

I've had tonsilitis and I'm not sure if I can sing on Saturday [whilst out on the town in the West End]
View quotes by Leona Lewis

I've signed a long term contract. I think it's a six week contract, but it could be seven weeks with a win on Saturday!
View quotes by Gary Megson

The feeling in the dressing room after Saturday's defeat to Wales was one of absolute shock. We were all stunned by what had happened.
View quotes by Andy Gomarsall

American grammar doesn't have the sturdiness of britishh grammar (where a good advertising man can make an ad for anything sound like the magna carta), but it has its own scruffy charm.
View quotes by Stephen King

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