Here are a list of Quotes from the delightful Northern Irish Comedian Danny McCrossan
Even the most powerful lie detector invented couldn’t drag a secret out of a woman, however, women rarely have lunch with lie detectors… - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian
See women need to talk because they feel like they have to have adequate levels of communication in order to sustain a healthy and open relationship, whereas men are only driven to speak because of matters beyond their control, like not being able to find clean socks. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
In Pagan times, uninspired people made sacrifices at the altar, and today, thanks to marraige, many still do. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
When women are bored they do the usual things, they eat, they go shopping, they neurotically judge the looks of other women, but men, men invade another country! - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
Anything that I’ve ever done that ended up worthwhile, initially scared me to death. Wether it was walking out on stage for that very first time, or asking a girl to include me in her plans for the future, but you know what, You have to risk everything sometimes or you risk even more. It’s not the challenges we face that define us, it’s the actions we take. - Danny McCrossan -Northern irish Comedian.
Everyone had big plans for me when I was younger, it was a cliche “Danny can do anything he wants to do” So I did the only thing I ever thought was worthwhile, bring laughter into the world. How I came to been seen as somewhat of a dissapointment to all those people who had made plans for me, well that still makes me chuckle. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
You learn alot in your teenage years, for instance I learned that if you’re ever being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a little tunnel, then onto a mini seesaw and then jump through a ring of fire, they’ve trained for that y’see. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
Asking people in Northern Ireland what they think of politics is like asking the Jews what they think of Hitler. - Danny MCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
There are too many warnings on packaging these days - defrost before eating - Use as directed - I mean, what’s next, you buy a packet of condoms, warning - may contain nuts! - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
I say don’t conform, don’t allow yourself to be pigeon holed, it’s no good for the soul, and the pigeon doesn’t enjoy it either. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
I remember how nervous I was my very first gig and I remember when I walked out on stage and spoke those words, how the audience laughed and laughed. I swore, there and then, that one day I would have my revenge. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
The sign said “This door to remain closed at all times” Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t that defeat the purpose of a door? - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
View quotes by Danny McCrossanI remember when I first came to Washington. For the first six months you wonder how the hell you ever got here. For the next six months you wonder how the hell the rest of them ever got here.
View quotes by Harry S TrumanNo steam or gas ever drives anything until it is confined. No Niagara is ever turned into light and power until it is tunneled. No life ever grows until it is focused, dedicated, disciplined.
View quotes by Joan RiversYes, we must ever be friends; and of all who offer you friendship let me be ever the first, the truest, the nearest and dearest!
View quotes by Henry Wadsworth LongfellowFirst witch: When shall we three meet again,
Second witch: In thunder, lightning, or in rain?
When the hurly-burly's done,
When the battle's lost and won.
Third witch: That will be ere the set of sun.
First witch: Where the place?
Second witch: Upon the heath.
Third witch: There to meet with Macbeth.
First witch: I come, Greymalkin!
Second witch: Paddock calls.
Third witch: Anon!
All: Fair is foul, and foul is fair:
Hover through the fog and filthy air.
(Macbeth, Act 1, Scene 1)
View quotes by William ShakespeareA citizen, first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.
( Funeral oration on the death of George Washington.)
View quotes by Henry LeePlaying is the only place where I've felt in touch with my sexuality, my spirituality and my emotions, and never ever, ever anywhere else. So my life is a bit tricky because when I'm not playing, I'm just trying to walk down the street.
View quotes by Tori AmosEver tried? Ever failed? No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.
View quotes by Samuel Beckett"When I was 14, I was the oldest I ever was. I've been getting younger ever since."
View quotes by Shirley TempleAnd Charlie, don't forget about what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. He lived happily ever after. - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
View quotes by Roald DahlAll experience is an arch wherethrough gleams that untravelled world whose margin fades for ever and for ever when I move.
View quotes by Alfred Lord TennysonNo government ever voluntarily reduces itself in size. Government programs, once launched, never disappear. Actually, a government bureau is the nearest thing to eternal life we'll ever see on this earth!
View quotes by Ronald ReaganDemocracy is the most vile form of government... democracies have ever been spectacles of turbulence and contention: have ever been found incompatible with personal security or the rights of property: and have in general been as short in their lives as they have been violent in their deaths.
View quotes by James MadisonNo modest man ever did or ever will make a fortune.
View quotes by Mary Wortley MontaguNo period of history has ever been great or ever can be that does not act on some sort of high, idealistic motives, and idealism in our time has been shoved aside, and we are paying the penalty for it.
View quotes by Alfred North WhiteheadIt has ever been since time began, and ever will be, till time lose breath, that love is a mood - no more - to man, and love to a woman is life or death.
View quotes by Ella WilcoxWhat has 'theology' ever said that is of the smallest use to anybody? When has 'theology' ever said anything that is demonstrably true and is not obvious? What makes you think that 'theology' is a subject at all?
View quotes by Richard DawkinsAs I rejected amnesty, so I reject revenge. I ask all Americans who ever asked for goodness and mercy in their lives, who ever sought forgiveness for their trespasses, to join in rehabilitating all the casualties of the tragic conflict of the past.
View quotes by Gerald FordDon't mourn for me now, don't mourn for me never - I'm going to do nothing for ever and ever [what he would like to have inscribed on his tombstone]
View quotes by Dave AllenAlex Ferguson is the best manager I've ever had at this level. Well, he's the only manager I've actually had at this level. But he's the best manager I've ever had.
View quotes by David BeckhamView Results: page 1
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