Here are a list of Quotes from the delightful Northern Irish Comedian Danny McCrossan
Even the most powerful lie detector invented couldn’t drag a secret out of a woman, however, women rarely have lunch with lie detectors… - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian
See women need to talk because they feel like they have to have adequate levels of communication in order to sustain a healthy and open relationship, whereas men are only driven to speak because of matters beyond their control, like not being able to find clean socks. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
In Pagan times, uninspired people made sacrifices at the altar, and today, thanks to marraige, many still do. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
When women are bored they do the usual things, they eat, they go shopping, they neurotically judge the looks of other women, but men, men invade another country! - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
Anything that I’ve ever done that ended up worthwhile, initially scared me to death. Wether it was walking out on stage for that very first time, or asking a girl to include me in her plans for the future, but you know what, You have to risk everything sometimes or you risk even more. It’s not the challenges we face that define us, it’s the actions we take. - Danny McCrossan -Northern irish Comedian.
Everyone had big plans for me when I was younger, it was a cliche “Danny can do anything he wants to do” So I did the only thing I ever thought was worthwhile, bring laughter into the world. How I came to been seen as somewhat of a dissapointment to all those people who had made plans for me, well that still makes me chuckle. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
You learn alot in your teenage years, for instance I learned that if you’re ever being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a little tunnel, then onto a mini seesaw and then jump through a ring of fire, they’ve trained for that y’see. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
Asking people in Northern Ireland what they think of politics is like asking the Jews what they think of Hitler. - Danny MCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
There are too many warnings on packaging these days - defrost before eating - Use as directed - I mean, what’s next, you buy a packet of condoms, warning - may contain nuts! - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
I say don’t conform, don’t allow yourself to be pigeon holed, it’s no good for the soul, and the pigeon doesn’t enjoy it either. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
I remember how nervous I was my very first gig and I remember when I walked out on stage and spoke those words, how the audience laughed and laughed. I swore, there and then, that one day I would have my revenge. - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
The sign said “This door to remain closed at all times” Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t that defeat the purpose of a door? - Danny McCrossan - Northern Irish Comedian.
View quotes by Danny McCrossanAm I the Irish comedian with half a finger? No, I'm the Irish comedian with nine and a half fingers.
View quotes by Dave AllenNo child is born a criminal: no child is born an angel: he's just born. [Remark]
View quotes by Sir Sydney SmithI am convinced all of humanity is born with more gifts than we know. Most are born geniuses and just get de-geniused rapidly.
View quotes by R Buckminster FullerCharacter isn't something you were born with and can't change, like your fingerprints. It's something you weren't born with and must take responsibility for forming.
View quotes by Jim RohnBeing Irish is very much a part of who I am. I take it everywhere with me.
View quotes by Colin FarrellIf all men are born free, how is it that all women are born slaves?
View quotes by Mary AstellEvery Christian is born great because he is born for heaven
View quotes by Jean Baptiste MassillonThe dust of some is Irish earth,
Among their own they rest.
View quotes by John Kells IngramIf it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks.
View quotes by Brendan BehanI think she's amazing - and not just because she is Irish
(yeah right Louis, on Nadine)
View quotes by Louis WalshI think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same.
View quotes by Iris MurdochI'm irish but I design something that is quintessentially English and I love hats.
View quotes by Philip TreacyAs no man is born an artist, so no man is born an angler
View quotes by Izaak WaltonNot all horses were born equal. A few were born to win.
View quotes by Mark TwainYou have to be born a sex symbol. You don't become one. If you're born with it, you'll have it even when you're 100 years old.
View quotes by Sophia LorenFrom this amphibious ill-born mob began
That vain, ill-natured thing, an Englishman. (The True-Born Englishman)
View quotes by Daniel Defoe'I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my Mum. I know I've got Irish blood because I wake up everyday with a hangover.'
View quotes by Noel GallagherPeople have been asking me what the Irish - in one word - will bring to the Ryder Cup.....alcohol. And if I could just add something to that - plenty of it!
View quotes by Paul McGinleyPeter Mandelson has hardly been in Brussels two weeks and already Wales has fallen into the Irish Sea.
View quotes by Michael AncramView Results: page 1
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