Dave Barry Quotes

Dave Barry quotations
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Dave Barry

For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
Dave Barry quote

Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep.
Dave Barry quote

Grammatically, should of is a predatory admonition; as such, it is always used as part of a herpetological phrase.
Dave Barry quote

Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
Dave Barry quote

Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.
Dave Barry quote

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
Dave Barry quote

More and more products are coming out in fiercely protective packaging designed to prevent consumers from consuming them. These days you have to open almost every consumer item by gnawing on the packaging.
Dave Barry quote

Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.
Dave Barry quote

Biography

US columnist, 1947+



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