Truth never comes into the world but like a bastard, to the ignominy of him that brought her birth.
John MiltonMy best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.
Joan RiversOf course Michael Vaughan should attend the birth of his first child.
It's something, after all, that he'll only experience 2,3 maybe 4 times in his life.
Stephen BrierlyThe pains of childbirth were altogether different from the enveloping effects of other kinds of pain. These were pains one could follow with one's mind.
Margaret MeadCrabs do not give birth to a bird.
AnonymousA friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
Erma BombeckI never know what to get my father for his birthday. I gave him a hundred dollars and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
Rita RudnerHappy birthday to you. (Title of song 1935)
Pattie S HillShadow owes its birth to light.
John GayPoverty is a lot like childbirth - you know it is going to hurt before it happens, but you'll never know how much until you experience it.
J K RowlingIt's not really difficult to go from one voice into the next. It's like asking you to sing a line of Happy Birthday and then Goodnight Irene - assuming you know the words to both those songs
Hank AzariaVulgarized knowledge characteristically gives birth to a feeling that everything is understandable and explained. It is like a system of bridges built over chasms. One can travel boldly ahead over these bridges, ignoring the chasms. It is forbidden to look down into them; but that, alas, does not alter the fact that they exist.
Czeslaw MiloszOur birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.
Jean Paul RichterA theory can be proved by experiment; but no path leads from experiment to the birth of a theory
Albert EinsteinFrom birth to 18 a girl needs good parents. From 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash
Sophie TuckerEvery aspect of Western culture needs a new code of ethics - a rational ethics - as a precondition of rebirth.
Ayn RandI will be joining the campaign with a song in my heart, with a spring in my step [on the birth of his first child]
Charles KennedyCustom forms us all; our thoughts, our morals, our most fixed belief, are consequences of our place of birth
Aaron HillThere is something about a poet which leads us to believe that he died, in many cases, as long as 20 years before his birth.
James ThurberSince giving birth to their daughter: I feel better. I feel hornier. I feel more womanly and more accomplished and prouder.
Tea LeoniWashington's birthday is as close to a secular Christmas as any Christian country dare come this side of blasphemy.
Alistair CookeLike all of us in this storm between birth and death, I can wreak no great changes on the world, only small changes for the better, I hope, in the lives of those I love.
Dean KoontzTo understand the mysteries of life you must look around and within. You will see patterns everywhere; patterns that seem to manifest themselves over and over again. These patterns exist intertwined within nature and man bridging the gap between the enigma of self and universe. You see them in spiraling galaxies and the Mandelbrot fractal of fossilized Ammonoidea; growing from the unknown to atoms to molecules to solar systems to galaxies to the paradoxical expanses of the universe with origins and destinations unknown; just like us in birth and death. The similarities of tree branches, rivers and blood veins. The power of cellular division and nuclear fission, the patterns of finger prints like endoplasmic reticulum, or a black opal's play of fire like the nebula of supernova. Moon shots are like protoplasmic lurches, while simple thoughts and observations of the nature around us take us beyond the unknown. The clues to the great mystery are all around us and deep within us.
Bryant H McGillHe has not lived badly whose birth and death has been unnoticed by the world.
HoraceToday we frankly recognize that democracy can be no more than aspiration, and have rule not so much by the people as by the cleverest people; not an aristocracy of birth, not a plutocracy of wealth, but a true meritocracy of talent.
Michael YoungYesterday at The Oval had to be the most thrilling moment of my life... perhaps after the birth of my children. [on England Ashes win 2005]
Gladstone SmallI cried on my 18th birthday. I thought 17 was such a nice age. You're young enough to get away with things, but you're old enough, too.
Liv TylerOur birth is nothing but our death begun.
Edward YoungCalled to the throne by the voice of the people, my maxim has always been: A career open to talent without distinction of birth. It is this system of equality for which the European oligarchy detests me
Napoleon BonaparteWe should try to achieve things for ourselves and not rely on former or past family glories with which we have no connection but the arbitrary nature of our birth.
Shirley FranklinPeople ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.
George BurnsI sometimes get birthday cards from fans. But it's often the same message - they hope it's my last.
Al NormanFor my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.
Steven WrightThe cause of freedom is not the cause of a race or a sect, a party or a class-it is the cause of human kind, the very birthright of humanity.
Anna Julia CooperSome decent, regulated preeminence, some preference given to birth, is neither unnatural nor unjust nor impolite
Edmund BurkeWhen real nobleness accompanies that imaginary one of birth, the imaginary seems to mix with real, and becomes real too
Fulke GrevilleWith my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
Rodney DangerfieldHe will find out the hard way on his birthday that he has got a present he never wanted [on fighting Khan on 8th Dec, his birthday]
Graham EarlYou can tell it's a journalist's child because all he wants to do is to drink and sleep. [on birth of his third child]
John HumphreysAren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.
Bart SimpsonThey proclaim that every man is entitled to exist without labor and, the laws of reality to the contrary notwithstanding, is entitled to receive his 'minimum sustenance' his food, his clothes, his shelter, with no effort on his part, as his due and his birthright. To receive it, from whom?
Ayn RandBirth was the death of him.
Samuel BeckettLife is like a very short visit to a toyshop between birth and death
Desmond MorrisMy obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.
Joan RiversIt is fortunate to be of high birth, but it is no less so to be of such character that people do not care to know whether you are or are not.
Jean De La BruyereMaybe it's my birthday, I honestly don't know. I'm 58? There's not much I need - I have plenty of socks
Arsene WengerAll souls must undergo transmigration and the souls of men revolve like a stone which is thrown from a sling, so many turns before the final release... Only those who have not completed their perfection must suffer the wheel of rebirth by being reborn into another human body.
Jean Paul RichterIt [giving birth] was easier than having a tattoo.
Nicole AppletonIt was like having
an 8 month hangover! [when about to give birth]
Debra StephensonHome is one's birthplace, ratified by memory. [an interesting quote indeed, Mr Grunwald]
Henry Grunwald
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