Billy Connelly Quotes

Billy Connelly quotations
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Billy Connelly [Autograph]

I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be.
Imagination | Billy Connelly quote

In Scotland, there is no such thing as bad weather - only the wrong clothes.
Weather | Billy Connelly quote

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!
Billy Connelly quote

Beauty is only skin deep but ugly goes right to the f***ing bone
Billy Connelly quote

To a member of the audience who was heckling - 'Don't tell me how to do my job, do I go to your job and tell you how to sweep up
Billy Connelly quote

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's on the outside of your ass?
Billy Connelly quote

Scottish-Americans tell you that if you want to identify tartans, it's easy - you look under the kilt, and if it's a quarter-pounder, you know it's a McDonald's.
Billy Connelly quote

A woman's mind is as complex as the contents of her handbag; even when you get to the bottom of it, there is ALWAYS something at the bottom to surprise you!
Billy Connelly quote


Scottish comedian (NB: this is a common mis-spelling, actually Billy Connolly)

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Billy Connelly Keywords

Actually, Billy, Connolly, Comedian, Scottish
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